Andy

I really don't have time to go through your 5-10,000 photos and pick out my ones. If you don't have permission to publish them then none of them should be there. Some of them even have my copyright logo on them...

I have a big pile behind me and a pile of address labels. Anybody fancy stuffing envelopes?

Can I assume you've contacted all the other photographers and obtained permission as there are copyright photos of mine in there and you've certainly never asked me...

All these years riding and you still haven't sussed it? Always the first Monday in May so Monday 7th this year. Pre-65 is always the Friday/Saturday before.

Someone please tell me I'm not alone in being totally lost by this topic. Edit: just remembered who neil le clean is...

Yup - got it ta. Just published (complete with abysmal English!) along with Dougie's report.

Oh FFS!

"slightly soiled"?

CK bought Dougie's lycra one-piece at the Scott Charity Auction.

If that is the case would it not, from a cost perspective, be more efficient to send both out at once?

Bet you'll be sat there tomorrow night in your Montesa lycra one-piece with your King Doug flag. OMFG - what a hideous thought! I must find a barfing smiley Edit: That's better

The SAS, the Parachute Regiment and the Police decide to go on a survival weekend together to see who comes out on top. After some basic exercises the trainer tells them that their next objective is to go down into the woods and catch a rabbit, returning with it ready to skin and cook. Night falls. First up - the SAS. They don infrared goggles, drop to the ground and crawl into the woods in formation. Absolute silence for 5 minutes, followed by the unmistakable muffled "phut-phut" of their trademark silenced "double-tap". They emerge with a large rabbit shot cleanly between the eyes. "Excellent!" remarks the trainer. Next up - the Paras. They finish their cans of lager, smear themselves with camouflage cream, fix bayonets and charge down into the woods, screaming at the top of their lungs. For the next hour the woods ring with the sound of rifle and machine-gun fire, hand grenades, mortar bombs and blood curdling war cries. Eventually they emerge, carrying the charred remains of a rabbit. "A bit messy, but you achieved the aim; well done", says the trainer. Lastly, in go the coppers, walking slowly, hands behind backs whistling Dixon of Dock Green. For the next few hours, the silence is only broken by the occasional crackle of a walkie-talkie "Sierra Lima Whisky Tango Fanta One, suspect headed straight for you..." etc. After what seems an eternity, they emerge escorting a squirrel in handcuffs. "What the hell do you think you are doing?" asks the incredulous trainer, "Take this squirrel back and get me a rabbit like I asked you five hours ago!". So back they go. Minutes pass. Minutes turn to hours, night drags on and turns to day. The next morning, the trainer and the other teams are awakened by the police, holding the handcuffed squirrel, now covered in bruises, one eye nearly shut. "Are you taking the ****!!??" asks the now seriously irate trainer. The police team leader nudges the squirrel, who squeaks: "Alright, alright, I'm a ******' rabbit!"

Huh? The first world indoor round is tomorrow night in Granada, Spain. I know Octagon change things a lot, but usually not even they change countries at this short notice.

I likes that one

Blimey - that came as a shock even to me and I hear most things beforehand. One thing that Dabill lacked last year was a consistent minder. He had a world round minder in the shape of Michele of Top Trial Team, who did a great job - albeit with the Italian temperament!, but a different minder for the British Championship. There was no consistency throughout the season. Although I've met Jack, I can't say I know him that well. However, I think having a consistent minder and a fellow-Brit alondside him will do Dibs the world of good. Jack just learns to eat big Macs, talk like Shaughan and not get his a*** out on camera (but we're saving that photo for a special occasion!)

Fair enough, produce Trials press releases in Spanish as it's a good market for Trials, but by not also providing the same information in English they are alienating not only the UK, USA, Canada, Australia and New Zealand but many, many other countries where they have a very good grasp of English (far more so than they have a grasp of Chinese - Mandarin or Cantonese...)

You don't pull sickies when you're a multi-millionaire that owns the company

Why should I have to? English is the most widely spoken language on the planet. If they can't be bothered with providing press info in English I certainly don't have time to use online tools to translate and then to fix the pigeon English output - it reads like one of Octagon's English press releases

Got the Scorpa Press Release. A French company, backed by the Japanese who send their press releases out in Spanish.

I fancy a nice photo of my foot booting the Montesa Press Man's a**e for sending me this same bloody 5-Meg email five times so far and totally clogging things up

It's that Perce bloke. Perce - go sit on the naughty step and don't come down till Nora says so.

No anti-virus? Wouldn't surprise me if your PC was rootkitted.

Should pay a damned sight more than that, IMO. In my day, we walked.

It's been removed. Perce has been a good boy and the novelty had worn off.

Did you download the zip? I've not downloaded all the video as I was there! I'm interested to know what the total running time of the whole lot is. BTW, the "one-fingered salute" as you've so politely put it!, was disguised as a head-scratch a la Peter Kay