essex rider

Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it. Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted. Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey. After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana. And that, Gordon, is how you can solve the immigration problem...... just shoot a few at the border

I noticed this today, only when the bike was cold and on very low tickover. Dont know if it means anything but it stops once the engines warm or if i fiddle with tickover speed.

Id had the bike a day when i noticed a lillte bit of oil on the surface of the cap, not all collecting at the base but actually on the cap. I thought it just needed a little nip up but the tiny amount of pressure cracked it, although the previous leaking suggests it had been overtightened before and started to crack. Oh well, the new ones fitted and i wont be doing that again. Just ordered an awesome set of bars for it too although i doubt they will tame the power at all....

Just picked up an 08 4t and been playing on it in the field. Its only too powerful if you ride it like a 2 stroke. Ive found 1st gear to be fine for most things and it gripped well without going over half throttle (slow action). On steps i found 2nd suitable but when used with the clutch a lot more. Ive tried my hardest to tell the difference between the 2 maps but cant notice very much. I think a few teeth bigger on the back would slow it down but might be a bit jumpy, so ill stick with the 42 mostly because i cnt afford to experiment with different ones. Finally i should add that its laying on its side in the garage after the oil filter plug cracked when i tightened it, wont be doing that again.

Have you heard about the new crossbreed dog - its a cross between a Rottweiler and a Labrador. It scares the s**t out of you but then goes to get the toilet roll !!!! Essex Rider

Has enyone had any experiance of trying to fit a trials bike in a Toyota people carrier.Not too worried about it gettibg muddy.Thats what dads are for!! Essex Rider

Its more performance enhancing than personalising as the new sticker is soooooo much lighter than the original one.

The sticker doesnt have a smooth enough finish for laquer to work well. Its waterproof and quite sticky so shouldnt move. Im just stripping the bike down and trying to decide what else to smartiefy? any ideas?? I would do the hubs but i cant be bothered to strip the wheels down again after changing half the spokes to black ones, AAGGH it was a nightmare!!

The sticky stuff is from homebase aimed at childrens bedrooms etc (why was i even in that department??) its called fablon if that means anything to anyone out there? Ive got the "SH" from the old sticker so probably put that on there or i may cut the "SH" off every other sticker and have an erco?? I cant go too near the petrol tank cos it dissolves into a nasty gooey mess as i discovered earlier when testing it. All im waiting for now is my billet flywheel cover to finally be done which i may have to have the smarties logo engraved on to it??

i was rather bored today as you can now clearly see.

Only just seen this.....normally i would laugh but that looks to painful. You should have stayed in to watch big brother instead. You should leave those (easy ) cotton reels to the pro's (no names mentioned here but 1 rides a sherco too) Get well soon

Im thinking if anyone does try 2 get in, i have a full power air pistol with flat non penetrating pellets. From a personal accident it F*****G hurts but didnt pierce skin, Had a golfball size lump though so that should make them squeal. And you probably wouldnt get in the ****??

What ya think??

heat it with a heat gun or hairdryer and stretch it. a little water can help slide it into where its got to go. HTH

petrol takes too long to evaporate and can ruin some grips.. experienced this with cycle grips. Brake cleaning fluid evaporates much more quickly and as far as i can tell doesnt damage the grips, and doesnt leave nasty gluey stuff everywhere! plus the grips are solid in about 5mins