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Lovely pic' Deryk....
We're at the Classic Bike Festival at Donington today (Fri), Sat and Sun...... some good racing and lots of stalls and exhibitions. Sammy Miller will be there parading some of his bikes.
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Sister Mary Katherine entered the Monastery of Silence.
The Priest said,"Sister, this is a silent monastery. You are welcome here as long as you like ,but you may not speak until I direct you to do so."
Sister Mary Katherine lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Priest
said to her, "Sister Mary Katherine, you have been here for 5 years. You can speak two words."
Sister Mary Katherine said, "Hard bed." 'I'm sorry to hear that," the Priest said, "We will get you a better bed."
After another 5 years, Sister Mary Katherine was called by the Priest. "You may say another two words, Sister Mary Katherine."
"Cold food," said Sister Mary Katherine, and the Priest assured her that the food would be better in the future.
On her 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Priest again called Sister Mary Katherine into his office.
"You may say two words today".
"I quit," said Sister Mary Katherine.
"It's probably for the best", said the Priest, "You've done fook all but moan since you've been here.."
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Your assistance is greatly appreciated.
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This is just what we needed, thank you Charlie.... http://www.bsaotter.com/the_works_ariel_colt__200cc_trials_bike.html
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Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in Brisbane Airport Terminal.
The first lady was an arrogant woman married to a wealthy business man.
The second was a well-mannered elderly woman from Gladstone, Queensland.
When the conversation centred on whether they had any children, the Victorian woman started by saying,
“When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me.”
The lady from Gladstone commented “Well, isn’t that precious?”
The first woman continued, “When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes Benz”.
Again the lady from Gladstone commented, “Well isn’t that precious?”
The first woman continued boasting, “Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.”
Yet again, the Gladstone lady commented, “Well isn’t that precious?”
The first woman then asked her companion, “What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?”
“My husband sent me to charm school,” declared the Gladstone lady.
“Charm school?” the first woman cried, “Oh my Lord! What on earth for?”
The elderly Gladstone lady responded, “Well as an example.....instead of saying, “Who gives a ****" I learned to say,
“Well, isn’t that precious.....”
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https://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/TxNrizGdhtY?vq=hd720&rel=0&showinfo=0&start=0&end=
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The science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "What human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?"
No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, "You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!"
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, "Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?"Little Mary's mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, "Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!"
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, "Anybody?"Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, "The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye."
Mrs. Parks said, "Very good, Billy," then turned to Mary and continued. "As for you, young lady, I have three things to say:
One, you have a dirty mind.
Two, you didn't read your homework.
And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed."
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Ordered, what a helpful chap. Top job.
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Excellent, thank you. I didn't see that on their website. Greatly appreciated.
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Thanks Simon, I've scoured their website and found nothing, so I sent an email over the weekend to see if they can help.
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Can anybody point me in the right direction of where to go for a 60 tooth sprocket for my '58 Scottish, please? Thanks.
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Wonderful, thanks Deryk......
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Any of them! Where can I find them without having to trawl through ( and losing myself for a few hours gazing ) them....??
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Brilliant, thanks Charlie.
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... a mate of mine is looking for any information on Ariel Colt trials bikes. I think I recall seeing one many years ago. He's thinking of building one as a project.
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... today, Saturday the 30th of July.
Part of the classic bike festival being held there.
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Read the description... http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/252470468076
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http://www.1959bhsmustangs.com/VideoJukebox.htm#
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A small church had a very attractive big-busted organist, Linda, and her breasts were so large that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ. Unfortunately, she distracted the congregation considerably.
The very proper church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist. So one of the ladies approached Linda very discreetly about the problem, and told her to mash up some green astringent persimmons and rub them over her breasts, which should cause them to shrink in size, but warned her not to taste any of the green persimmons, because they are so sour they will make her mouth pucker up, and she wouldn't be able to talk properly for a while. The voluptuous organist reluctantly agreed to try it. The following Sunday morning the minister walked up to the pulpit and said, "Dew to thircumsthanthis bewond my contwol, we will not hab a thermon tewday.
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Bit of localised heat, let it get hot and cold twice, then a few light taps to free it. Hopefully!
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Oh for the days when you wore a woolly hat in winter and a flat cap in summer..... purely for holding a hot spark plug so you didn't burn your hand.
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How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
• Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
• A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
• I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
• Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
• England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
• I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
• They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.
• I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
• Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
• I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
• I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
• This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
• When chemists die, they barium.
• I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
• I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
• Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
• I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
• When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
• Broken pencils are pointless.
• What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
• All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
• Velcro - what a rip off!
• Don't worry about old age; it doesn't last.
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