the addict

A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart. It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the ...pouf. Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the woman's feet and said in a rather stern voice, "Skippy!". The woman thought, "This is great!" and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again. This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer fart rip. The father again looked and the dog and yelled, "Dammit Skippy!" Once again the woman smiled and thought "Yes!". A few minutes later the woman had to let another one rip. This time she didn't even think about it. She let rip a fart that rivaled a train whistle blowing! Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled,"Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she ****in ****s on you!!..

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She repeats this gesture about five more times. When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the little old lady, "Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself?" ... "We can't chew them because we have no teeth," she replied. The puzzled driver asks, "Why do you buy them then?" The old lady replied, "We just love the chocolate around them."

It feels like 20 kgs mate, I have no idea why though, its hard to imagine its only a few kgs difference.

I was only chatting to my brother about this on the weekend, I find it hard to believe the 4rt is only a handful of kgs heavier than say the Beta or Gasser. I lift Gerty and a Beta into the back of my van some weekends and I'd not be surprised if the weight difference was actually nearer 20kgs. I never get concerned with the bikes weight as its possibly what makes it feel so stable and planted, my 07 Cabby was way to light for me, felt like a push bike and seemed to go wherever it felt like on an open throttle.

Looks a great place to ride even in the wet, concrete is very slippy, best get enough speed and momentum up before you hit the obstacle so you can close the throttle over or on it, not always easy though.

Great stuff,

10/40 is the same as 11/44, if you want to lower it more stick the standard 42 on the back. As Betabonkers said, 9 is too small for the front, bigger on the back is a better way to go.

Just to even things up lads, Jock & Jimmy were walking along a street in London. Jock looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye. The sign read, "Suits £5.00 each, Shirts £2.00 each, trousers £2.50 per pair". Jock said to his pal, "Look at the prices! We could buy a whole lot of these and when we get back to Scotland we could make a fortune. Now when we go in you stay quiet, okay? Let me do all the talking cause if they hear our accents, they might think we are cheap Scotsme...n and try to screw us. I'll put on my best London accent". "OK Jock, I'll keep me mouth shut" said Jimmy They go in and Jock said in a posh voice, "Hello my good man. I'll take 50 suits at £5.00 each, 100 shirts at £2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at £2.50 each. I'll back up me truck ready to load them on, old chap! The owner of the shop said quietly, "You're from Scotland, aren't you?" "Well yes," said a surprised Jock. "What gave it away?" The owner replied, "This is a dry-cleaners........" !

Paddy runs into the pub and says ''Mick your cars just been stolen!!'' ''Feckin hell, did you see who stole it?'' ''No'' says Paddy ''But I got the registration number!!''

My dwarf girlfriend went to work this morning upset with me, because I've been taking the p*** out of her size. So I'm going all out to make it up to her tonight. I've got a good bottle of wine in the fridge and bought her the latest dvd box set of her favourite programme. When she gets in from work I'm going to order her favourite takeaway for her tea, then go upstairs and run her a nice hot sink.

One for Donald and Andy at my expense. 4 people in the carriage of a train - a Scotsman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and an Welshman. It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges from the tunnel the Welshman is rubbing his face, and there's a huge red mark on his cheek. The old lady thinks: "I bet that Welshman fondled the blonde in the dark and she slapped him." ... The pretty young blonde thinks: "I bet the Welshman tried to fondle me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him." The Welshman thinks: "I bet that the Scotsman fondled the blonde in the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me." The Scotsman thinks: "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon so I can slap that Welsh **** again."

I took it they had perished long ago, I grease everything on a new bike and if that had been done if the bearing was missing it would have been picked up before the first ride not 10 months later. I've serviced other peoples bikes and seen virtually no signs of a bearing in the dog bones or linkages as they've never been greased or serviced before, just fell out or disintegrated. I'll apologise now if I'm totally mistaken though, and its possible this is a pdi problem not Honda's?

Signed, the tiny minority seems to get the upper hand with motorsport these days, one family can remove 60 years or more of racing via a simple complaint about noise when they knew bloody well what they were moving next to when they bought the house. I believe Hawks Nest had some problems in the past? as others.

Mallory Park being a very good example, shame on them, it nearly closed the circuit down totally.

Its not the first time you've picked me up on this mate,

I think it depends on what the end use of the milk is, prices vary wildly depending on that. I have a friend who is struggling fairish with these prices at the moment, as is the entire oil industry.

Dear me, apologies all, must try harder.

No, and a year is too long to leave the rear suspension.

I've had 4rt's since 2007 and I've never had even the slightest of problems with fuelling neither has any of my friends who have Monts, and I've never heard of any issues either at a trial, on here or anywhere else. The only issue I've heard of are tired fuel pumps, and these are generally from old 05/06 bikes, probably done a few SSDT's and toughish lives. I'll be out on mine tomorrow at 8.30am, expect the weather will be minus something and I can expect the bike to run all day exactly as it would in the summer or any condition, perfectly as ever.

The lawyer says to the wealthy art collector tycoon, "I have some good news and, I have some bad news.” The tycoon replies, "I've had an awful day, let's hear the good news first.” The lawyer says, “Your wife invested £50 in two pictures today that she figures are worth a minimum of £2 million.” ... The tycoon replies enthusiastically, “Well done, very good news indeed! You've just made my day; now what’s the bad news?” The lawyer answers, “The pictures are of you screwing your secretary."

Isn't one of the points of a forum to debate topics, be a bit boring else, nice to read other peoples views.

I always used 70ml to 5 litres of super unleaded with Castrol TTS oil, and when I could get it, 50/50 with Avgas.

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Standard bike mate, and yes, Morad rims not DID sorry.