steveo

Little Johnny came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. Christmas was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted. "Mum, I want a bike for Christmas". Little Johnny was a bit of a troublemaker. He had got into trouble at school and at home. Johnny's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for Christmas. Little Johnny, of course, thought he did. Johnny's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behaviour over the last year, and write a letter to God, and tell him why he deserved a bike for Christmas. Little Johnny stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter. LETTER 1: Dear God, I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for Christmas. I want a red one. Your friend, Johnny. Johnny knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started over. LETTER 2: Dear God, This is your friend Johnny. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for Christmas. Thank you, Johnny. Johnny knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started again. LETTER 3: Dear God, I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for Christmas. Your friend, Johnny. Johnny knew he could not send this letter to God either. Johnny was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church. Johnny's mother thought her plan had worked because Johnny looked very sad. "Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said. Johnny walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street,into his house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Johnny began to write his letter to God. LETTER 4: I'VE GOT YOUR MUM. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE F***ING BIKE. Signed YOU KNOW WHO

A Young man called Ron wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new girlfriend. As they hadn't been seeing each other for very long, he decided after careful consideration, that a pair of gloves would strike the right note, not too romantic and not too personal. He went with his girlfriends sister to Harrods and bought a dainty pair of white fur lined gloves, The sister bought a pair of Knickers for herself at the same time. During the wrapping the shop assistant mixed up the two items, the sister got the gloves and Ron got the knickers. Without checking Ron sealed the package and sent it to his new girlfriend with the following letter:- Dear Sasha, I chose these because i've noticed that you are not wearing any when we go out inthe evenings. If it had not been for your sister I would have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears shorter ones which are easier to remove, These are a very delicate shade, but the lady i bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and they were hardly soiled at all, I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart in them even though they were a little bit tight on her. She also said that the pair rubs her ring which helps keep it clean and shiny, In fact she hasn't needed to wash it since she began wearing them. I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt many other hands will touch them before I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off remember to blow into them a little bit because they will be naturally a little damp from wearing,Just think how many times my lips will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for me on Friday night. All my love Ron. P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little bit of fur showing.

Thought you were a ky man sean....lol

Have to agree with you there Steve,about this getting old ......but you just got to look on the brighter side of each passing year an enjoy. Like your verse "the older I get the better I was",and from your posts I gather Ive been around the block a fair bit longer than you, and can honestly say I still feel ambitious enough to try to improve riding skills for the gained satisfaction and enjoyment it still brings, no matter how old you are ,and that is the great attraction of trials riding....have a great Christmas. Steveo

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honour of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on, "It represents a candle" he said. You may pass through the pearly gates Saint Peter said. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said "They're bells". Saint Peter said you may pass through the pearly gates. The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. Saint Peter looked with a raised eyebrow and asked "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "They're Carols."

Funny you should say that Austini,this is my neighbour and she told me that the best oil is ...................................I forgot the brand,.....no matter.....Oh yeh oil,.......she told me the best oil is in her garage, so I try to get a bit off her at least once a week..... She assures me its works with two strokes or four strokes or six strokes or eight strokes,low smoke and certainly reduces friction at high speed as well, so good luck ,hope you end up using BP lawn mower 2T, you can see why I changed.

No their not? Looks like Dicky Frog has lost his Knuts

You Beta riders do seem ah ah ah ah ah a little .....odd

Yes. It's a good one isn't it? Maybe Nick already knows where stump magnet lives. Even if he knows the chimney could be a problem

I am still wearing those same pants from 2001 but I am going to treat myself to new set of gear for next year as I have lost some weight. Yeah , I know what you mean Peter , things tend to shrivel up as you get a bit older, I can even wear shorts now with out causing embarressment

Ah now, the Scorpa SY250 doesn't belong to me, that is the property of "Even Bigger Dave" (son of Big John). He's about three inches taller than me and even more handsome (sickening isn't it?) The Beta REV3 isn't mine either, that belongs to "Steveo", (younger son of Big John), little bit smaller than me for the moment, he's the rock drummer of the family who is into a bit of downhill and 4 cross MTB at the moment! Everything he does, he does quite well, American Football, Golf, even more sickening he usually whups me at trials as well! Big John Hey Dad, I found this great place in Australia to live....Dont think I will be back for awhile,would you mind sending my Beta over,Tell mum not to worry, will be in touch soon . Steveo

If it weighs 70 kg and is red and has a CHROME frame it something Ive been dreaming about. What have you heard..or are you teasing ?????

Is that your bike? GULP

Im thinking that its Warren Laugenson the New Zealand top Gun. I reckon he would have got a bigger kick out of scarin all those kids parents than you can imagine....

Have a great little bike that has never fell off its stand in 30 years and 7 months,and definitly no dinges May be interested in a swop.....

How can Tony deal with it ...he is the slug that Andy caught out in the first place ! Looks like his bad habits have only been perpetuated by his staff members. Prior knowledge of anyones commercial operations ....what a load of s%it , Don't try deflecting the seriousness of this just because Im not a Pom.

Obviously a hard situation they put you in Andy,especially after their initial expulsion from TC. Maybe they did not think you had the courage to expose their deceipt. Well done ! Wish there were more people with the back bone to bring to task much of the wrong doings that are happening in our world....

Bet you will .

Good post greeves

I'm disappointed,for some reason I imagined you were a gynocologist... Maybe the Dr..... or the Avitar...

Putting a 315 master cylinder in a 05 does what, over the original MC. Fitting a Mitani clutch to an 05 does what ? Which is the best mod of the above two options, and why?

Wow Peter, you must be on a new 08 Beta......

If you think his biggest problem is on immigration you obviously are an ostrich!. His term in office has change the whole world in which we ALL live! Any thinking non American should and are interested in American politics...the American way affects the whole planet ,and if you care to look outside your own backyard and delve into an old saying,"Money is the root of all Evil" you my get the picture of how your great country is now percieved by many. I am not taking a cheap shot here Brian, but we get so many damning news articles and documentries on so much your government and its departments are responsible for, both openly and clandestinely, that it is hard not to believe its population can support such injustices.