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Indian Pop Charts 35 Poppadum Preach - Madonna 34 Korma Chameleon - Culture Club 33 Bhaji Trousers - Madness 32 King Prawn Massala Drinks Are Free - Wham 31 Dansak Queen - Abba 30 Korma People - Pulp 29 Tikka Chance On Me - Abba 28 When I Phall in Love - Nat King Cole 27 You Can't Curry Love - Diana Ross and the Supremes 26 Korma Police - Radiohead 25 Things Can Only Get Bhuna - D:Ream 24 Tears On My Pilau - Kylie Minogue 23 It's Bhuna Hard Days Night - The Beatles 22 Brothers in Naans - Dire Straits 21 Girlfriend in a Korma - The Smiths 20 Pilau Talk - Doris Day 19 It's My Chapati and I Cry If I Want To - D.Stewart/B.Gaskin 18 I'm a Bhaji Girl - Aqua 17 Sag Aloo - Black lace 16 Take That and Chapati - Take That 15 Bhuna Round The World and I Can't Find My Bhaji - Lisa Stansfield 14 I Don't Want To Dansak - Eddie Grant 13 Dansak on the Ceiling - Lionel Richie 12 We Are Jalfrezi - Sister Sledge 11 Vindaloo - Abba 10 I Don't Want to Go to Chutney - Elvis Costello 9 Rice Rice Baby - Vanilla Rice 8 Jalfrezi Jalfrezi Nights - Kiss 7 Tandoori Deliver - Adam and the Ants 6 Love me Tandoor - Elvis Presley 5 We Don't Have to Tikka Clothes Off - Jermaine Jackson 4 Bye Bye Balti - Bay City Rollers 3 Bhuna to be Wild - Steppenwolf 2 Livin' Dhal - Cliff Richard 1 Raita Here, Raita Now - Fatboy Slim

Mrs Addict turns over to a cooking programme. The addict says to her, 'why you watching that? you can't cook' she replied 'Well you watch porn' ---------------------------------------- I've just bought a Jehovahs Witness advent calender.Every time you open a window a head pops out and shouts - Bugger off --------------------------------------- An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Naples, Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said: "Father, during World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighbourhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So I hid her in my attic." The priest replied: "That was a wonderful thing you did my son, and you have no need to confess "There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favours. This happened several times a week, and sometimes twice on Sundays." The priest said, "That was a long time ago, and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven." "Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. I do have one more question." "And what is that?" asked the priest. "Should I tell her the war is over?'' ---------------------------------------- An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church. 'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last confession... I had sex with Fanny Green twice last month.' The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's.' Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional. 'Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I've had sex with Fanny Green twice a week for the past two months.' This time, the priest questioned, 'Who is this Fanny Green?' 'A new woman in the neighborhood,' the sinner replied. 'Very well,' sighed the priest. Go and say ten Hail Mary's.; At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall, voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes. The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realize she wasn't wearing any underwear. The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, 'Is that Fanny Green?' The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his ears but managed to calmly reply, 'Jesus, No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes. --------------------------------------------------- A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature." The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action." The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?" "1955, ma'am." "Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955." The Sergeant Major said, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now." ------------------------------------

Good Point mate....Bunga Bunga parties at Gav's

Real question in this thread is which two other muppets voted for Gav as PM???? Where's your manifesto Mr Lewis!!!

Brilliant move by the ACU and a great step forward. We cannot continue down the road the sport has gone in the past few years, otherwise there will be bugger all left. The two most important trials on the calendar are No Stop, SSDT and the Scott they work and they work well. No one can say hat those trials are badly laid out, no one can say those are bad trials and thats where BTC is heading. WTC is a circus and BTC was heading the same way, a championship cannot sustain itself long term with only a few riders, this was inevitable. These arguments are old hat, I remember the same arguments when Stop came in unfortunately our sport, with a few exceptions, has rapidly gone downhill since. Great move, I'm thouroughly looking forward to see how the future of trials develops.

Rumour is Murray got ound but is tight on time Mairi wasnt sure results soon hopefully

Speaking of shoes.... Paul McCartney is a bit pi$$ed with the new wife, her shoe bill is twice as much as the previous wife. In turn though, new wifie is pi$$ed with the man himself. She asked him to give her a foot rub so he reached for some sandpaper.

Man with hole in trouser pocket feel cocky all day

Seen in my local rag's lonely hearts column, male crossword compiler wishes to meet female crossword compiler, with a view to 1 across: coarse pipe tobacco 5,4. ------------------------------------- Confucius Say Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient. Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly. Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent. Squirrel who runs up woman

The BBC have just announced that Gaddafi may have slipped into Jordan. Has that woman no shame?

Ironing... IS a woman's job! Simple science tells us that women should be ironing. The difference between 'male' and 'female' is obviously the 'fe'. If we look up 'fe' in the periodic table it stands for iron. Science 1 - Women 0

Please find attached a report on the Nationals from Team Fracy WTC Canadian Nationals Report.pdf

400 odd here.... all pretty low res Photobucket

Some interesting comment. I can't complain about anything because we had passes for the Bash on the Ben and anyway I don't think that does any good, the event is done. However, constructively the lack of a trade park and food stalls was disappointing as was the lack of a T shirt stall. The entertainment was pretty good but the gap in the middle of the afternoon without trade or food stalls to keep your attention was noticeable. Last year was that much bigger but that's to be expected of an event that was a whole day longer. We don't know much of the reasons behind the changes so it's difficult to comment. I enjoyed my weekend and the actual trial was pretty mind blowing but it also begs a few questions. Where does WTC go from here, 10 in Champs class are being kept afloat by a large Junior class. The lack of youths was a disappointment and for me Bou is so far ahead that there appears little point in the rest turning up. Raga was the muttz nuts this weekend but he can't maintain the consistency and without wishing to demean the efforts of everyone else they are a step behind. I don't see any talent simmering in the Juniors or Youth Group that could step up to challenge. I think the sport needs wholesale change of some sort to make it more competitive at the top end and to try and find some way of reinvigorating that sport at every level. Wish I had an answer

After all the comment you've made about Dougie over the years, I can't be bothered arguing, until Toni eclipses Dougie, He stays the Boss.

Because until Toni eclipses Dougie's records, Dougie Lampkin is the Boss

In Scotland but sent it anyway. This stuff and the sodding Ramblers affect us all!!

Thanks PAL!! taken me five minutes to clean the Crunchy Nut Cornflakes off my laptop!!!

No Alexz this weekend I suspect, Facebook is covered in pics of a massivley swollen and bruised ankle, he's on crutches as well, looks like a training accident. Shame was looking forward to watching him, he may not be getting top three results but by god you cant fault his effort....from last year....

Took three days....thats not bad for some of you......

I think there's little point thinking about WTC when BTC is in a crap state as well. I think we, as in the UK, need to sort BTC first. Six in Championship class is rediculous and you have to ask how long clubs will organise a headline BTC event when only six riders turn up in the top class.

Good point....Gloves off on the raghead jokes...

I know where you can maybe get your hands on a brand new 2011 version...cheap

Classifieds module?? it was that once before wasn't?? We've got something back that's a start

80 pages....FANTASTIC.......20 more we break the ton...JUSTIN!!!