How To Wash The Cat

[perce]

MEMO

To: All cat lovers

From: A concerned friend

Subj: How to wash the cat

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet and remove the thing that makes the water blue.

2. Add an appropriate amount of shampoo, based upon the size of the cat, to the toilet water. Leave both lids up.

3. Retrieve the cat and soothe him/her as you carry him/her towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and immediately close both lids.

NOTE: You may need to stand on the lid.

CAUTION: Do not allow any part of your body to come too close to the edge of the toilet, as claws will be reaching for anything they can find.

5. Wait while the cat self-agitates, making ample suds.

NOTE: Disregard the noises coming from your toilet. The cat does actually enjoy this.

6. Flush the toilet three or four times to provide a "power-wash" and "rinse," which is quite effective.

7. Have someone open a door to the outside and ensure that there are no people or other living things between the toilet and the outside world.

8. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids. Consider using a towel or belt from a bathrobe to lift the lids. (See "CAUTION" on item number 4.)

9. The cat will fly from the toilet, and run outside where he will thoroughly dry himself with no further assistance.

Good luck. This really does work!

Sincerely,

The Dog

[ishy]

CAUTION!!! it doesn't work with little kittens

[kevin j]

CAUTION!!! it doesn't work with little kittens

what, they plug up the drain?

[barrybaines]

CAUTION!!! it doesn't work with little kittens

what, they plug up the drain?

Now that made me laugh